Perspective

You know the saying you never know what you have til it's gone?

So. Fucking. True.

Living and growing up in Utah, I hated it.

cold, mountains, snow, religion, lack of diversity, school systems, small towns

Turns out those are the very things I miss and long for. Upon moving to Tejas, I expected to love the warmth, the flat landscape, the different town. I thought I would be happy never seeing snow again. I thought I wouldn't mind the landscape being flat. I expected there to be more diversity than Utah.

Remind me again why this is attractive?

My three months down here have shown me otherwise. I miss 

bundling up in sweaters

seeing the snow fall softly on the ground

crunching the leaves beneath my feet

seeing my breath in the morning

cooking warm soups

the cool temperatures

seeing clouds roll in over the mountains

being close to everything

the sense of pride in community

Texas has none of those. The past few weeks have been in the 70s and 80s, even dipping into the 90s at times. The landscape is so flat I can't find my way around anywhere. I need those landmarks to tell me which direction to go. Sure, there aren't as many mormons down here, in fact, I have yet to meet one. But everything is about church. And everyone here is so politically red it makes my face red. If you count half Mexican and half white diverse then yeah, there is diversity. But I'll be damned if I can't get any Indian food or sushi down here. 

I know I seem like I complain all the time. But the truth is, I'm sad here. I miss my family. I miss my friends. I never thought I would say this in a million years, but I miss my Utah home.